True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
