Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
The cops high fived after they tackled you
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