Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
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