$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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