idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
