How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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