What a fucking waste of an outfit
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
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