Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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