she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
