So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Let the clothes fall where they may.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
