If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
Randomize
