My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Randomize
