I feel like I'm in dance class right now
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
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