Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
Randomize