R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
