we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
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