I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
