fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Randomize