Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Still dying that you shit outside
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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