if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
