My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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