You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
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