My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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