Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Randomize
