Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
Randomize
