toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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