Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize