Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
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