see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!�
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
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