whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.�
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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