Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize