Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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