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at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
