i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
This show inspires me to have sex in space
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
