yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
