ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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