yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Randomize
