okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
