in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize
