At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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