When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
