glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
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