I am puke
If that was your dad, he is hot
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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