how can u be prego again
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Randomize
