real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
