just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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