the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
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