Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
