I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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