Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
